Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Life Crisis

OK, so in the past couple of days, really starting on Monday afternoon, I was faced with a serious personal The kind of thing that in an instant takes everything you thought you knew about your life and throws it out the window.

I have been consumed by fear and anxiety. I was pulling out every self-talk thing I had...

  • Thinking about Dan Gilbert, and knowing that my mind will compensate and it won't be as bad as I think.
  • Telling myself that there's no point to regretting what has happened in the past, and only a point in moving forward.
  • Telling myself to take responsibility for what I was facing.
  • Telling myself that people go through what I was facing all the time, and come out happy.

I don't know if any of this worked. I had tons of (probably appropriate) gut-level anxiety, but really only one full-fledged panic attack. So, I got that going for me.

And, I guess you would have to say I coped, right? I mean, I didn't curl up in a ball, kept working, all of that.

But, it was sure hard.

The crisis has passed, and apparently will not come to fruition. The relief was palpable. I don't know how I feel about how I did. It was classic fear and self-recrimination. But, again, there was no meltdown. Just a lot of looking into the abyss.

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